Saturday, December 8, 2012

Lincoln jokes, part 2

A conference was held in early 1861 just before the outbreak of what came to be called the Civil War. It was billed as a peace conference and was meant to bridge the gap[s] between North and South.

That, of course, reminded Lincoln of a story.

"I once knew a good sound churchman, whom we will call Brown, who was on a committee to erect a bridge over a very dangerous and rapid river. Architect after architect failed, and, at last, Brown said, he had a friend named Jones who had built several bridges and could build this.

“’Let us have him in,' said the committee. In came Jones. ‘Can you build this bridge, sir?' ‘Yes,’ replied Jones, ‘I could build a bridge to the infernal regions if necessary.'

“The sober committee was horrified. But when Jones retired, Brown thought it but fair to defend his friend. ‘I know Jones well,' said he, ‘and he is so honest a man, and so good an architect, that if he states, soberly and positively, that he can build a bridge to Hades, why, I believe it. But I have my doubts about the abutment on the infernal side.'

“When politicians said they could harmonize the northern and southern wings of the democracy, why, I believed them. But I have my doubt about the abutment on the southern side."

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